| I have long pondered on why humanity as a whole | | | | unconditionally and without reservation, forgive the |
| practices "eye for an eye," especially after reading | | | | transgression. If nothing comes to mind, start with |
| about Mahatma Gandhi's life and learning the concept | | | | family and friends. There is usually some little piece of |
| that an "eye for an eye only ends up making the | | | | baggage that can be dropped. Family and friends are |
| whole world blind." The message of peace is within | | | | easy, fore there is some level of love present, but |
| most of the world's doctrines, and yet, it is practiced so | | | | once things quit popping into mind, move onto enemies, |
| rarely. | | | | old bullies, former backstabbers, etc. Visualize the |
| Forgiveness is one of the keys to peace. In the New | | | | persons and tell them that you forgive them and send |
| Testament, Matthew 6:14 states, "For if ye forgive | | | | you unconditional love to them. |
| men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also | | | | Over time, you may want to take this exercise to the |
| forgive you." Luke 6:37 states, "...Forgive, and ye shall | | | | next level. Start with everyone you know and forgive |
| be forgiven." In the Koran, too, (42:20): "And the | | | | every transgression against you. The next step is to |
| recompense of evil is punishment like it; but whoever | | | | forgive those who have transgressed against those |
| forgives and amends, his reward is with Allah." A | | | | you care about. You eventually work your way down |
| favorite of mine is an Islamic saying from Nahjul | | | | to anyone who has transgressed against another. It |
| Balagha (Saying 201): "The best deed of a great man | | | | may not seem to matter when you forgive another |
| is to forgive and forget." This so closely resembles the | | | | for harming someone you don't know...or didn't even |
| common saying of "forgive and forget" that I heard | | | | now the act was committed; however, this is the |
| during my youth. | | | | unconditional portion of forgiveness that helps when |
| I could go on, because I have found that the message | | | | working with unconditional love. Many say that we are |
| of forgiveness is prevalent in spiritual doctrines all over | | | | all connected at some level, so you may provide some |
| the world. Forgiveness is preferable to holding a | | | | relief to another at some level by forgiving them. |
| grudge, which would only fester and poison the spirit, | | | | Lastly, forgive yourself. Eventually you must forgive |
| and we must take responsibility for the grudges and | | | | yourself for the harm you have done to others and |
| injuries that others feel toward us (real or imagined). | | | | yourself. |
| So how do we forgive? I can't explain it, because for | | | | The past can not be changed, but you can make a |
| me it is akin to explaining how to love. But I do know | | | | new future. Learn from the mistakes of the past. But |
| when forgiveness is complete and finished. | | | | there is no need to make it a burden and carry the |
| Remember the old saying, "Forgive and Forget"? In my | | | | baggage. There's no need to punish yourself, for once |
| experience, it would be more accurately said, forgive | | | | the lesson is learned further punishment only causes |
| and then you will forget. I find that when you have cut | | | | unnecessary pain. So in an exercise, you can forgive |
| the last tied-up piece of resentment, pain, etc., and let it | | | | those who harmed you, those who have harmed |
| go, suddenly it fades and later it takes effort to | | | | others, and yourself for causing harm. |
| remember the incident happened. When I do | | | | To complete the exercise, you can finally ask |
| remember, there are no negative feelings attached to | | | | forgiveness for the harm you have caused (real or |
| the recollection at all. | | | | imagined). This portion is the most remarkable for me. |
| If you can't forgive, there is something within you that is | | | | For in visualization, I have seen people vividly smile and |
| holding onto it. Sometimes, it is only a matter of seeing | | | | nod as I ask for forgiveness, and then when I see |
| the other's perspective or walking a mile in their shoes. | | | | them again, our relationship is much better. Of course, if |
| With understanding, forgiveness becomes easy. With | | | | you plan to see the person, you may wish to offer |
| greater love, too, forgiveness becomes easy. How | | | | forgiveness in person. That is the way to go, because |
| can you love someone unconditionally with emotional | | | | it has more value at a conscious level. |
| baggage, grudges, etc., getting in the way? To have | | | | At the end of these exercises, you will find you are |
| unconditional and fully blossomed love for another, the | | | | carrying less emotional baggage. You will find that you |
| slate must be clean. I do a meditation/free-thought | | | | have forgotten incidents and are no longer dwelling on |
| exercise to facilitate this cleaning off the slate. | | | | previous injuries. This is a good test of unconditional |
| Once you are relaxed, try to recall grudges you | | | | love. And lest we forget, in forgiving others, we shall |
| currently have and forgive them as they come up; | | | | receive forgiveness and/or the rewards of the divine. |